Pride Month and a simple question: will I still belong?

michaelgreeneducat
19 hours ago
3 min read

As Pride Month begins, a new set of statistics from Childline provides an important reminder for all of us who work with children and young people. Last year, Childline delivered 2,457 counselling sessions relating to sexuality and gender identity. Most strikingly, more than two in five of those sessions focused on concerns about coming out. Young people spoke about fears of rejection, worries about how parents might react and anxieties about losing friendships. Behind each statistic sits a child carrying a question that is both deeply personal and profoundly human: Will I still be accepted if people know who I really am?

More than a statistic

The findings resonated with me both professionally and personally. Earlier in my career, whilst working at the University of Greenwich, I proudly served as a Stonewall trainer, delivering training to leaders across primary, secondary and further education. Much of that work focused on helping organisations create cultures where people felt safe, respected and able to be themselves.

The conversations I had with school and college leaders often centred on inclusion, belonging and creating environments where every young person could thrive. Whilst society has undoubtedly changed, the Childline statistics suggest that many of the underlying fears experienced by young people remain remarkably familiar.

Coming out is not a one-time event

The Childline figures also resonate on a more personal level. As a gay man, I can remember those worries about coming out all too well. One of the common misconceptions is that coming out happens once and is then somehow complete. The reality is often rather different. New colleagues, new friendships, new workplaces and new professional relationships can all bring the same quiet calculation: how much should I share about myself and how might people respond?

Whilst those moments become easier with age and confidence, the underlying questions remain remarkably familiar. Will I be accepted? Will people see me differently? Will I still belong? Perhaps that's why the Childline findings struck such a chord. They remind us that behind every counselling session is a young person grappling with many of the same fears and uncertainties.

Why belonging matters for mental health

For schools, there's an important lesson here. Pride Month can sometimes become focused on visible activities. Displays are created. Assemblies are delivered. PSHE lessons are planned. Whilst these things can and do have value, the deeper question is whether our schools genuinely feel safe and inclusive every day of the year.

Would a pupil who is struggling with their identity know who they could talk to?
Would they trust that adult enough to seek help?
Would they feel confident that they would be listened to without judgement?
Would they believe that they belong?

These questions matter because belonging isn't simply an inclusion issue. It's a wellbeing issue. It's a safeguarding issue. It's a mental health issue. The relationship between belonging and mental health is well established. Children who feel isolated, excluded or unable to be themselves are more likely to experience anxiety, low self-esteem and emotional distress. Conversely, children who feel accepted and valued are more likely to develop resilience, confidence and positive mental wellbeing.

When I reflect on my own experiences growing up, I'm conscious of how much energy can be consumed by worrying about whether you will be accepted. For young people already navigating the complexities of adolescence, those worries can become overwhelming.

The role of schools

This is where schools can make an extraordinary difference. Teachers and school leaders don't need to have all the answers. Nor should they be expected to. What they can do is create cultures where children know they will be treated with dignity, listened to with respect and supported when they need help.

Sometimes that support is found in a trusted conversation. Sometimes it's found in a pastoral team that notices when something is wrong. Sometimes it's found in a culture that makes it clear that every child matters and every child belongs. At its heart, this is not a debate about Pride Month. Nor is it about politics. It's about children. It's about ensuring that every young person can come to school feeling safe, valued and respected. It's about recognising that some children are carrying worries that may not be immediately visible to the adults around them. And it's about understanding that acceptance and belonging are not optional extras. They're fundamental foundations for both learning and wellbeing.

As Pride Month is marked across the country, perhaps that's the message worth remembering. Beyond the rainbow flags, beyond the displays and beyond the awareness campaigns lies something much simpler. Every child deserves to feel safe being themselves. For some young people, that simple reassurance can make all the difference.

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